Man in the Cage

When I was younger, I used to wonder why the heck guys wrestled. What's so great about being twisted up with another sweaty, dirty, gritty guy? Well, my husband coaxed me into watching some cage fights on TV. I was "taken down" by the raw, truly, man to man art form. These guys work day in and day out so they are in the best shape their body can handle, just to fight another opponent for a maximum of 9 minutes. They combine all martial arts, some including boxing, kick-boxing and wrestling; no weakness is allowed and no escape is possible. Hence the cage.

I was thinking about why this is such a big deal to guys. I started to realize that my husbands brain works just like these fights. When he has something on his mind or in the cage, he doesn't tell me about it right away. Why? Because he is trying to decide which opponent he needs to be to overcome an obstacle. Is he the explosive fighter with all the tattoos? Or is he the one with a longer reach and dynamite wrestling moves? What is it going to take within himself that can help him get that new job, make that deadline, or overcome that nagging depression.

As a wife, I want to blow the hinges off the cage door and pull him out of it before he takes another punch. I want to snap him out of this crazy idea that he can face this alone. I want to make the pain go away. I forget that every fight teaches my husband something about himself. It doesn't mean I can't be outside the cage cheering him on. When he is jammed into the corner and sweat, dirt and grit are all he is, I can remind him I'm here. I'm present and even if he taps out, I love him. Because the man in the cage is him. He is that strong, he is that dedicated to his family and he has all the skills he needs to face his world today.

Challenge: It sounds silly, but wrestle with your husband. Be physical with him, find a way to remind him how strong he is.